Most people already know what they should be doing.
A leader knows they need to communicate differently. A business owner knows they need to delegate. An employee knows they need to speak up. Someone trying to make a personal change knows exactly which behavior needs to stop.
Yet knowing doesn't necessarily change what they do.
That's because information and behavior are two different things.
We often focus on the action we want to change without asking what is driving that action in the first place. A person may understand logically that a behavior isn't helping them and still repeat it because something underneath that behavior continues to serve a purpose.
The same thing happens in business.
A leader may continually take over instead of delegating because giving up control feels uncomfortable. A manager may avoid difficult conversations because avoiding conflict provides immediate relief. A business owner may continue making every decision because being needed has become part of how they define their value.
Telling these people what they should do differently doesn't address what is actually driving their behavior.
That is why sustainable change starts with a different question.
Instead of asking, “What should I be doing?” ask, “Why am I continuing to do this when I already know it isn't producing the result I want?”
That question takes us beneath the action and into the behavior.
Once we understand what is driving a behavior, we have something we can actually work with. We can begin making intentional choices rather than repeatedly reacting from patterns we may not even realize are operating.
This applies to leadership, communication, relationships, workplace culture, performance, and personal growth.
Knowing gives us information.
Understanding gives us the opportunity to change.
And when behavior changes, results change.
Debbie Longo
Executive Behavioral Coach
